Michael Cargill

Regular updates of sarcastic and irreverent nonsense.

About

Michael CargillSatire, parody, sarcasm and irreverence.  Those four things are, by and large, what this site is all about.  The news items are complete fabrications.  The characters writing opinion pieces and articles are just that – characters.  Nothing on this wee blog that is written about the numerous celebrities that fill our world is true.  The thought of a pampered millionaire getting all upset and angry, because I said that they feed onions to their pet horse fills me with dread.  After all, those botox hangovers can be horrendous.

Comments, suggestions and feedback are more than welcome.  If you have a subject or a news item that you would like me to write about, or even a picture that you want an amusing caption attached to, then feel free to ask!

Email – mcargill79@gmail.com

Twitter – @MichaelCargill1

http://www.facebook.com/MichaelCargillAuthor

http://pinterest.com/michaelcargill

Goodreads – http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/5239593.Michael_Cargill

70 responses to “About

  1. Hannah 09/26/2011 at 8:23 PM

    I wonder if maybe.. the joke about the picture is that there is no joke? Or that the people who used to be in the boat died? Although I’m not sure if that can be considered a joke..

    • Michael Cargill 09/26/2011 at 10:01 PM

      Hannah! Welcome to my domain, please have a seat and choose some toppings for a sandwich. The plates and knives are fresh out of the dishwasher.

      The boat joke is not much of a joke really – this is the ‘about’ page and it has a picture of a boat. About, boat. Slightly similar words ya see.

      I don’t know what sort of music you like but if you enjoy dance music you might be interested in The Future Sound of Egypt – http://www.fsoe-recordings.com

  2. April Trice 10/03/2011 at 6:40 PM

    Actually that boat looks more like a dingy. That picture could be the United Kingdom way of insulting someone. As in “You are dingy.” or “You are a ding-bat.”

    • Michael Cargill 10/03/2011 at 8:47 PM

      Pah, it’s nothing like a dingy. Even a London city boy such as myself who knows nothing of nautical terms can see that!

      Ding bat is an insult I haven’t heard for years but it’s fabulous. I like ‘pleb’ as well.

  3. April Trice 10/03/2011 at 9:12 PM

    HA! Pleb. One who makes a titface of himself in public. As for boats…I can’t swim. So riddle me this…do you speak the cockney, lad?

    • Michael Cargill 10/03/2011 at 9:36 PM

      Nah, I am not actually from London but it sounds better than saying I live in Surrey, which is one of the counties just to the south of London.

      Cor blimey guv’nor that April Trice is a lush ol’ crumpet who is easy on the mince pies. If she was my trouble I would be carrying her up my apples and pears each night.

  4. April Trice 10/03/2011 at 9:46 PM

    OWW! I ain’t dirty! I washed my face and hands before I come, I did!

  5. April Trice 10/03/2011 at 10:55 PM

    Of course I knew! However, I rarely pass up an opportunity to quote Eliza Doolittle.

  6. caramellokoala 10/05/2011 at 5:45 PM

    Hahahha ‘A Boat’, I know a few Canadians so I found it pretty funny.

  7. Brenda Spiller 10/24/2011 at 11:59 PM

    lol me too Caramellokoala. It was that that made me sign up here. I took one look and thought OMG thats classic! where’s the sign up button…well, that and Michael likes my photos, so he has to be a top notch bloke IMHO :)

  8. laurenrantnrave 10/30/2011 at 6:50 PM

    A blog about sarcasm tickles my toes. Delightful good fun!

  9. myemilyrose 10/31/2011 at 3:20 PM

    Hello!
    Review posted on my page! It was an enjoyable read! Well done for actually completing a short story! I have started a novel and it is draining me slowly!

    E

    • Michael Cargill 10/31/2011 at 3:36 PM

      w00p! I am all excited now.

      Everyone, take a look at Emily’s blog please. She does horse-riding, was asked to be in Game of Thrones and has a cracking picture at the top of her site.

  10. Becoming Bitter 11/07/2011 at 8:47 PM

    Another blogger who writes books. I’ll go have a look then…

  11. ♡ The Tale Of My Heart ♡ 11/13/2011 at 6:37 PM

    Interesting blog, Thanks for visiting my blog. I will be reading your posts ;)

  12. myemilyrose 11/25/2011 at 4:58 PM

    I just felt like dropping in and saying hello! :) I don’t really know why but there you have it!

    • Michael Cargill 11/25/2011 at 7:51 PM

      Why hello there Emily! This place may not be up to your usual high standards – we spell it cafe rather than café for example – but you are more than welcome to stay for a while.

  13. Pete Howorth 12/05/2011 at 5:06 PM

    Your blog didn’t make me laugh today as there was no new post. WAZ UP WI DAT?!?!?!

    Sort it out.

    • Pete Howorth 12/05/2011 at 5:14 PM

      Also I have decided to call you “Cargers” it’s my affectionate brotherly nickname I have come up with.

      Used in a sentence: “Cargers my man! Epic post”

      But of course, that line shan’t be used today.

      • Michael Cargill 12/05/2011 at 7:17 PM

        Sorry bro. Thinking up an awesomely hilarious post each day and trying to write a book at the same time has become too much I am afraid.

        I appreciate your fandom and your affection, as always.

  14. HaLin 12/10/2011 at 5:53 AM

    When I rest awhile on a blog, I prefer reading a few posts to see if there’s an overlap of interests…before proceeding to the About Me, which is generally worth the journey.

    We seem to be sailing – or sinking, as the case may be – in the same boat up there, mate.

    Keep the sarcasm oozing…you have a new reader!

  15. Pete Howorth 12/13/2011 at 7:16 AM

    Mate, I looked yesterday and you had 68 followers, now you have 306? What the fucK?

  16. myemilyrose 01/03/2012 at 11:53 AM

    I might have passed on a wee award to you!

    See here for rules of course! http://myemilyrose.wordpress.com

    Em.

  17. Hush 01/05/2012 at 3:43 PM

    Michael! This is yours truly myemilyrose I had to change my blog as I was infiltrated :(

  18. shrutitrivedi 02/09/2012 at 9:43 AM

    You got a pretty cool blog! And you know what’s best? That your posts are just lengthy enough to be read! And about sarcasm…much has been said already i guess!

  19. IntrovertedAnalyst 03/19/2012 at 7:24 PM

    I don’t know if you remember this; it’s been quite a while, but I finally finished and reviewed your book, “Shades of Grey” and am so very sorry about how long it took me. You can take a look at the review here: http://maggieflynn49.wordpress.com/2012/03/19/thoughts-on-shades-of-grey/

    Thanks again for asking me to review it- I had a really good time reading and analyzing it. Good luck with your books and your writing; I wish you the best!

  20. Carol 03/28/2012 at 1:56 AM

    My first thought at seeing the picture was to look for a little man. I even increased magnification only to discover it’s a boat, not a canoe. *sigh*

  21. No Blog Intended 04/06/2012 at 7:23 PM

    Tell me, what made you reveal your face to us? It’s weird that you are suddenly someone with a face, but it’s fair enough ’cause we all have a face. Well well, Michael, if I ever see you passing by, I will come by for a chat, okay? And maybe a signature, since you’re becoming a famous writer for sure!

    • Michael Cargill 04/07/2012 at 12:08 AM

      Dunno really. I have had a few people ask me what I look like and I am trying to raise my profile as a writer anyway. I shaved my head and beard especially for it.

      And please do pop over for a chat if you ever see me!

  22. sadieforsythe 04/18/2012 at 10:15 PM

    You always make me laugh so I have nominated you for a Sunshine Award.

    http://sadieforsythe.com/

  23. Summer Grant 04/23/2012 at 7:22 PM

    Hi, I read Becky’s interview with you over at Blogs-of-a-Bookaholic posted and I was wondering if I could ask a favour of you, please. I’m a magazine journalism student and I’m trying to write a feature for uni about authors who choose to self-publsih digitally instead of traditionally, would it be possible to interview you please? There’s a chance it might get published (but I’d say that’s very slim).

    Thank you.

  24. caedmoneries 04/29/2012 at 11:12 PM

    Oh my lord! I adore your blog. I think in the last ten minutes I’ve nearly hyperventilated from laughing so hard! I know I’ve gotten several strange looks from my roommates because I keep laughing. Love it!

  25. dockfam 07/03/2012 at 8:56 PM

    Always love a humor based blog, we all need to laugh that’s for sure!

  26. Karen 04/18/2013 at 12:23 PM

    Because I <3 you, I have nominated you for a Liebster Award: http://drawingroomdays.wordpress.com/2013/04/18/blog-awards/ xx

  27. Get More Info 04/29/2013 at 12:01 PM

    Yes! Finally someone writes about get the facts.

  28. Professor VJ Duke 06/28/2013 at 12:09 AM

    Satire, parody, sarcasm–can’t get any better.

  29. TBM 07/12/2013 at 10:53 AM

    Thanks so much for stopping by my blog and giving advice on how to fix my comment issue. Hopefully this will show up and not end up in your spam folder.

  30. RO 10/01/2013 at 9:18 PM

    Satire and sarcasm. Two words that start with an -s and my absolute favorites.

  31. Lafemmeroar 09/18/2014 at 4:23 PM

    Please write about how the Kardashians are now resting in peace 6 ft under….

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